Two weeks ago The Reporter reprinted one of my columns of 2008, while I was still unaware of my surroundings.
A friend showed it to me, otherwise I probably would not have believed it. Last month I was not aware of anything any more. I was in too much pain and thought the end was near. My doctor had also told me there was nothing that could be done anymore. So did another specialist who told me I was wasting lots of money and his time since he was not within our network.
I could not move my leg and the spine injection I had hoped for was very expensive and could, at the most, give four or maybe six hours relief.
No glimmer of hope was given. My desk was a hopeless mess, which I tried to clean up for the kids. It was there I found a paper that outlined all possible side effects on medication. In small print it mentioned a very rare possibility (only one out of 100,000 patients) of a fatal reaction. I had for years taken that medication and wondered if I could be one of those rare statistics.
I knew that in the last months the pills had been upped several times. So I stopped it. I also received one of those miracle stories of people who got cured the natural way. Thinking there was nothing to lose anymore, I ordered more literature about how the body could cure itself the natural way. I first had to get rid of the poisonous chemicals in my body.
It was a miserable time. Before the new approach could do me any good, the pain increased. So I doubled the pills they sent me to get rid of the poisonous chemicals.
That took several weeks, and from then on life became bearable again. I could move my legs again and I am learning to walk again, which, of course, is a slow and painful experience — something like when you have had legs in a cast and it takes months of therapy before you get normal use of them.
My mind is clearing too, and this is my first attempt after weeks to write a column. It is a slow process. It was too much for me when I went to a surprise birthday party for a grandson; I had not been to a family gathering and I felt miserable. I got bumped against my walker as I tried to move to an area where my own kids were. They had to carry me to the car, and I was disoriented and out of commission again. It was very discouraging. I had tried to force myself too fast to do too much.
I don’t remember much of the last of the year; could not document anything. My computer did not work, the printer stopped and the telephone did not even work anymore. I could not even hold a pen in my hands. Later I found out that my son, who died a year ago, had always taken care of my bills. Since then, no payments were made I was disconnected.
But now I’m beginning to walk again. And I can see as well as feel improvement. That’s a wonderful experience.
My shop at home is open for business again. I hope you will stock up on articles for future use. I need more room on my tables. I am knitting and crocheting again, so my inventory is growing. I also appreciate your company.
All money from sales will be donated to Food for the Poor and will be 100 percent matched by a grant until the end of February. And, as you know, I donate all money to Food for the Poor. I hope to get back in business. This will benefit us all, and will do more good than any individual can do alone. This must be a whole community effort.
Last week I also got notified that my brother-in-law in The Netherlands died unexpectedly. He went to church on Sunday, told his wife he was not feeling well and did not want to stay after church for lunch and a meeting. A friend decided to take them home. Instead he was taken to the ER, where he died of a stroke.
He had once been an accomplished organist who played and wrote music for different concerts and churches. That part of his life was over; he had for years taken care of his wife, despite his own handicaps and use of only one arm after a nasty fall. He was 100 percent dedicated to his wife, who cannot live by herself. The funeral had already taken place at the time I received the message. He was the last link to my husband’s family. I know no more details, and only feel a great loss. He will be missed by many. He had still kept me posted on news from the family. Even when he could type with only one finger, he kept us united. His life was not easy in any way, yet he remained involved and always found time to help others. He found homes for many refugees.
His wife had been an accomplished soloist at concerts. I still have recordings of some of her concerts. Their own children were musically inclined — a family of great promise. Their daughter was hit by a car and confined to a wheelchair before she was a teenager. It did not make him bitter, but seemed to deepen his faith and desire to reach out to others, teaching them how to cope with grief. I always admired and loved him, and so did others. He will be greatly missed.



